I don’t know what it is. At times I can’t write to save my own life. At times i write so fast my hands struggle to catch up with my brain. At times am strung so tight the only way to release the pent up energy is through scribbling my notebook over and over again.
Its always after i talk to you… For some reason you open up gates of words and thoughts in me. You take me to a new high. It’s the adrenaline rush that gets me so into my mind, down the gutters of creativity…exploring fields of words, gaping over mountains of thought, lost in the mist of creativity, drinking from the fountain of my own instincts.
And when i see you in my mind, when I conjure up thoughts of you, when it feels like i can literally touch you though you are but a fiction of my imagination…my pen runs wild over the pages…my notebook floods with you.
You and your smile. You and your sigh. You and your laugh. You and your insolence. You and your pretense. You and your pride. You and your surprisingly alluring stubborn streak.
Rummaging through the dust of past lovers…drinking in hope and searching in the journals….devouring page after page…indifference abounding in my wake. At the abyss where life meets death…where hope meets hopelessness, where faith is diluted by the lurking doubts…that’s where i find you.
You always wait. With the same jaded but knowing crooked smile. You always wear that “i knew you’d be back” attitude so well i am tempted to punch you.
But I saw galaxies in your eyes. I got lost in the stars within. I got drawn into the pool that’s your soul You drew me in with your smile. My muse, my inspiration.